What ho, oiks!
Ah, this is more like it. This, indeed, is precisely what we men of the shires fervently wished for when we reluctantly passed our pencil over the UKIP candidate and instead wrote our 'x' next to the Tory candidate's name at the last general election:
"We don't want more people from Sheffield flying away on cheap holidays".
No, old bean, we certainly do not! Poor old Pedro has quite enough on his plate without being subjected to a summer influx of Yorkshire yobbos puking their way across the Costa del Sol. But why, I ask, are these same oiks permitted to ramble across an Englishman's land from dawn until dusk? I quite agree that the ghastly stench of the proletarian classes ought not to be inflicted on our poor Continental cousins, but surely the same courtesy should be extended to me and to other landowners? I spend most of my summers chasing shell-suited plebs off my estate with a shotgun and frankly, chaps, it gets rather wearying.
Let us hope the admirable Mr Letwin turns his attention to this much more pressing problem. The leafy shires of our own realm require cleansing before we even think about protecting Pedro from the barbarian hordes.
Yours, etc
Viscount Crouchback
Mr Crotchrot ,please stop interbreeding with your cousins .Good day to you sir !
Posted by: Seamus | 14 May 2011 at 04:15 PM
Please oh please resume this blog in time for the RWC, oh GayLord.
Posted by: Biocunta | 25 August 2011 at 02:25 PM
Good day Viscount Crouchback!
This is quite sudden I admit, but do you have any opinion regarding the Cavendish family?
Posted by: Mojo | 31 August 2011 at 10:52 AM
Yes, this blog needs to be revived. The World Cup is only one week away.
Posted by: Gemini | 04 September 2011 at 03:06 PM
Come back Sir! With the world gathered together for the World Cup campaign, you have a global and attentive audience at your disposal. What are you waiting for?!
Posted by: The Antman | 25 September 2011 at 08:21 PM
Have you seen James Haskell's diary my Lord? I seem to remember you had a fondness for the fellow.
http://artofdomination.wordpress.com/2011/09/21/the-secret-diary-of-james-haskell-iq-25-12/
Posted by: Gemini | 26 September 2011 at 06:57 PM
Also, take your finger out and get back to your blog. It could be Ireland and England in the semifinals and I'm sure you have some condescension to share about Eire's prospects.
Your lowly servant,
Posted by: Gemini | 26 September 2011 at 07:00 PM
Dear Viscount , please fall down the nearest elevator shaft at your earliest convenience .Good day to you sir .
Posted by: Pete | 29 November 2011 at 10:48 AM